Day 210: Work is back to normal (sort of)

Well, the OT is finally over (thank God) although being short of techs means that some of us are working tickets we normally wouldn't be bothered with. Oh well, such is the life of a tech.

On an NSV note, I have some more bones finally coming to the surface. In addition to my clavicles, I have shoulder bones becoming visible and my cheekbones are becoming very visible. My knuckles are also rising to the surface of my hands. My fingers have less of the pudgy sausage shape and are becoming long again. My wrists are quite a bit smaller than they were 6 months ago. I'm less than 50 pounds from my goal weight and I feel really good about things right now.

As far as my romantic life and pursuits are concerned, I'm going to try to just go with the flow right now and see what happens. I've been told so many things and I believe so many things that anything could happen, but I have to open my eyes to everything. The right one might be in my life right now, or she might be around the corner waiting for me to see her the way she's going to see me. She's the one who's going to see me and realize that she wants me in her life for the rest of it and won't want to risk me walking away forever and taking everything I can offer along with me. She's going to be the one that I'm going to be willing to die for and be willing to kill for. Of those two options, the dying is the easy one. Killing..that takes a capability for absolute ruthlessness. For most people, they just don't have the capability to take another's life without a very strong defensive motivation and even then, giving the attacker a chance to stop will cause them to hesitate for even a split second. It's hard to do, to deprive someone of life for any reason. Most people just can't do it. It's not in them, the capability has been trained out of them by society. Unless you've been specifically broken down and rebuilt psychologically to be able to kill by flipping a switch in your head, you will hesitate. Those of us that have been trained to be that way can throw that switch and never hesitate. We might question afterward and for the rest of our lives, but we can do what has to be done right then. Soldiers and Police have to be that way. We aren't that way because of what's in front of us, but because of what we left behind us. What we want to protect from all of the ugliness of war or crime. We don't go to war because we want to kill anyone. We go to war to try to keep it from getting into our country.

Sorry to deviate from the mainstream of this blog, but I felt it needed to be said.

I'm going to sign off there before I get going big time.

See y'all later.