Day 228: Life must go on.

Despite the tragic news from Thursday, I can't change what happened and my friend can't come back so moving forward is the only option left to me. And I can play the "What If" game all day long and it doesn't matter because you can't remake the past. All you can do is build to a future. Gabrielle will be missed, and not just by me. I'm sure her family is in deep mourning right now and I wish them all the best and hope they get past the grief quickly. For a short, brief time in my life Gabrielle was mine and I was hers. Far too brief for both of us, but things happen the way they do for some reason. It just serves to remind me to cherish the time I spend with those I love that much more.

On the subject of spending time with those I love, one of the friends I reconnected with during my High School Reunion came out with her husband for a visit and I went to spend the evening with them after work. We met at their hotel, then went to get some pizza at my favorite pizza place. Then I gave them a tour of my condo and then we went to Karaoke. We had a good time laughing and singing and carrying on. Chrisy and I got up and sang a duet together and we had a good time doing it. We haven't sung together since we were in choir 25 years ago but we could still sing like we were in high school. We did "You're the one that I want" from Grease. It was a blast. We were both a little nervous, but that's ok. The odd thing is, in High School, we weren't great friends and didn't really hang out other than choir, but at the reunion we bonded almost instantly. It's weird how that kind of thing happens. I get the feeling that the two of us are going to be close and possibly even best friends from here on.

And before anybody gets any stupid ideas about my happy ending, just let that shit go. Chrisy is clearly happily married and her husband is a great guy. More importantly, I will not do to another person what was done to me. I'm not that selfish. If she were single, I could see myself making a play for her, but not if she's married. I was a third wheel a long time ago and that almost never turns out the way you expect or want. Someone ends up getting hurt. Maybe it's just me that gets hurt in those situations, though. It seems like every time I get in a third wheel situation, no matter which wheel I am, I get hurt. But sometimes there is collateral damage. When I got involved with Darci, Connie and Candace were hurt by my decision as well. The last break up also hurt Candace because she's never seen those particular friends since then. She's managed to make new ones, but I still hate the fact that she had to lose her friends and it wasn't her fault. I'm afraid that she might start seeing any relationship I might get into as a threat to her having friends and she'll stop trying to make friends because she's afraid of losing them.

Well, I need to call this quits and get some sleep. Busy day tomorrow.

Ciao!