Friday, July 8, 2011

Day 178: People sticking their noses in...

...where they sure as hell don't belong. Sorry, Loyal Readers but I'm going to deviate from the weight loss journey a bit today. If I don't write this out, it's going to fester in my psyche. I'm also not going to be editing for content. F-Bombs are going to be flying, so be prepared.

Anyone that has read my blog from the beginning knows about my situation with Cindy, knows how I feel, etc. She knows how I feel, I never hid or tried to hide it. But I also respected her wishes and never did anything to sabotage her relationship. Every month, there is an actual support group meeting for gastric surgery patients that she and I both attend. Of late, her man has been attending as well. Honestly, I don't like him, but he has every right to be there as part of her support system, so I don't begrudge him that. Apparently, people at these things have been coming to him after the meetings and telling him that I'm staring at her. I might be. If I am, I'm not aware of it because none of these people have come to me to discuss it. These same people are apparently friends with me on Facebook and have told him about my "underwear" pics. It's one pic, taken the day after surgery of my wounds and I'm clearly getting out of bed and getting dressed. I think some people are intentionally causing drama here and since it doesn't directly involve them, they get all the fun of watching the chaos they are causing and I'm FUCKING SICK OF IT!

For the record, if it doesn't involve your life directly, stay the fuck out of it! This is already a volatile situation with them. She's trying to maintain a friendship with me and a relationship with him. I'm trying to just get on with things, and he's insecure in the whole thing, as evidenced by what happened last night. I'm sorry for the friction this is causing her relationship. It's not right. I'm not apologizing because I didn't do anything wrong. Neither did she. Neither did he. This little triangle is getting buffeted because of a bunch of nosy so an so's. The ones who should be apologizing are the ones who started this mess.

If you're one of these people I refer to above, you should be ashamed. Mind your own damn business. I think there should be both misdemeanor and felony "Not minding your own damn business" violations in the criminal codes. If I find out who's doing all the talking and I find them in my friends list, you can damn well bet they will be unfriended with a quickness. I'm on the verge of never going back to one of those support meetings. I don't need them.

If she and I decide to remain friends, the only other person that impacts is him. Whether he likes me or not or I like him or not is irrelevant. She wants to keep me as a friend and as long as I respect her wishes in this, it's no one else's business. As long as I'm not doing anything to sabotage their relationship, whether I look at her, talk to her, or stare at her is irrelevant. She's a beautiful woman and I know I'm not the only man to stare at her. Apparently, everyone else is fascinated by my staring, if I'm doing it.

Sweet shivering Shiva!

Do I want her back? I'm saying right now, yes I do. Am I willing to hurt her to do so? No, I'm not! I would rather be without her and be able to look at myself in the mirror rather than do something underhanded and get her back and know that my actions hurt her.

If you're one of these talkers, you're the ones that are hurting her.

Kee-riced all my tea.

I'm out.

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